What if no one's watching...?

What if no one was watching you? What if you never got criticism or compliments? What if it truly was just you and God and no opinions, advice, or expectation? Would you still do what you do everyday? What if there were no friends to stop in and say hi, no places to go to that you needed to look a certain way, no family to lend a helping hand or to give you the push you need? What is our true reason for living OUR lives the way we do?

Compassion seems to be lacking...a warm embrace is hard to find. Would we still be willing to offer compassion and warm embrace? Or do we become cold towards others, because they are cold to us? How far are we willing to go to break the cycle of this ever changing world and its lack of LOVE for each other? Do we wait for a tragedy to lend a helping hand or do we see the tears and distress and lend our shoulder to ease the woe of a tired soul?

My spirit feels broken and beaten down...my heart aches from the negativity of others around me. I weep from exhaustion of never being what others expect me to be,never quite good enough...

However, I am the happiest I have ever been! I have never been so confident in my relationship with my God. I have never felt so whole in a relationship, like I do with my husband and the faith he has in our God. I have never felt more love from anyone, than I do from my son. I have a growing soul in my body, who I will soon see...and I truly can say that I am complete.

So, here I go again. One day at a time...trying not to hear what others are saying or worry what they might think if I do what I feel I need to do. I will be the pillar for the weak to lean on, I will be the hearer of those who need to speak, I will be the hand that wipes the tears of those in despair, and I will be the love that others need to feel! I will break down, but I will always be built back up....and this I swear, I will never give up!

Faith?

What is your first reaction when a dear loved one wrongs you or makes a mistake that really only hurts themselves? Do our own personal life experiences, shape and mold the way we react or can we choose to change our thinking based on something else? It makes me sad, how quick people can lose their Faith, because they feel someone they care about is doing something "stupid", when really they are only hurting themselves. I'm not sure if it's because I'm a mom, or that I personally have made MANY mistakes, or if it's my spirituality but I only FEEL for my friends who go through hard times and make wrong decisions. If we slander them or get angry and lose faith in them as people when they mess up, how can we truly accept them back when they realise what they've done and come back asking for help? The prodigal son comes to mind and how the brothers of this man hated him for the wrong he had done and didn't think their father should welcome him back, but the father saw the remorse in his heart and welcomed him back. Not to say that this is an easy way to naturally think, especially when we feel wronged or hurt...but how would we want to be treated if we were in their situation? Would we not want the DIGNITY to have a change of heart and have our loyal friends there waiting for our return? Maybe some cant grasp this, because they have never had to go through it...but can that really be an excuse for everything? Must we mess up in life to understand redemption, or can we use our deep love for others to drive our ability to understand to live and let live? How can we expect the ransom to cover our sins, but not the sins of others?